Problems bouncing back? It could be your unforgiving nature
By Colleen Carruthers
We all face adversity in our lives. Times when we meet challenges that can’t be overcome or at least appear to be insurmountable in our mind. The way we meet these challenges and ultimately bounce back is called resiliency. And it’s an important attribute because it helps us bounce back from adversity and stress.
Our relationships with others can affect our resiliency. Relationships are often a source of frustration. Differences of opinion and viewpoints can get us angry or upset, and cause us to be in places where we do not forgive. And, forgiveness influences our ability to be resilient.
Developing an ability to forgive is not easy. Forgiveness often challenges the essence of who we are: our values, our principles, our code of conduct and our moral campus. If you challenge these, you are challenging “my most inner me”; how could I forgive?
But there is a difference between forgiving and forgetting.
WBN’s Good Reads List
Over the past few years, the WBN Business Book Club has read some great books led by some fascinating discussions. If you’re looking to be inspired, here are a few suggested by the book club.
- Deliver the Unexpected – Richard Robbins
- Lean In – Sheryl Sandberg
- Thrive – Arianna Huffington
- Our Turn – Kristine Stewart
- Checklist Manifesto – Atul Gawande
- The Unstoppable Business Women – Liz Wendling
- Start with Why – Simon Sinek
- Year of Yes – Shonda Rhimes
- Option B: Facing Adversity, Building Resilience, and Finding Joy – Sheryl Sandberg
- You are a Badass – Jen Sincero
- Pivot – Adam Markel
- To Sell is Human – Daniel Pink
- The Productivity Project – Chris Bailey
- Daring Greatly – Brene Brown
- Makers – The New Industrial Revolution – Chris Anderson
- The Talent Code: Greatness Isn’t Born. It’s Grown. Here’s How – Daniel Coyle
- Big Magic – Elizabeth Gilbert
- David and Goliath: Underdogs, Misfits, and the Art of Battling Giants – Malcolm Gladwell
- The 7 Virtues of a Philosopher Queen: a Woman’s Guide to Living and Leading in an Illogical World – Barbara Stegemann
Build Your Resilience with 5 Key Strategies
By Jennifer Garland, The Mane Intent Inc.
I didn’t see it coming — ignored the danger signs. I thought I could handle having it all. Our children were young. I was serving as the Public Relations Director for Canada’s largest retailer. My husband was equally driven and ambitious. A new lab puppy named Montana completed the picture. From the outside – we looked like a power couple able to keep it together. What you didn’t see was my complete lack of sleep, emotional turmoil and a general all-over physical ache that just wouldn’t go away.
Then I lost my dream job in a corporate restructuring. My role was eliminated. ‘Constructively dismissed’ is putting it nicely. Job loss hurts. With my system already in over drive – my ability to ‘bounce back’ was hugely depleted. The experience sparked a downward spiral that left me breathless. At 33, I was diagnosed with burn-out. Personal resilience was not part of my vocabulary then. It is today, almost 20 years later, thanks to the wisdom of experience.